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Good Person.

Last night, he said he has things to tell me but find it challenging to put out into words, so he asked if he could write me a letter instead.

I was surprised and amused at the same time.

When he left, I read his full letter emotionally.

Perhaps so happened it played my favorite piano piece, ‘canon in d’ in background;

He strung my feelings with needed genuine assurance.


For a good whole twenty minutes, I re-read his letter many times.

It’s been ages since I had someone penning me something with his soul.

I actually see how someone ‘seize’ me up in his words.


“好人!”(good person) – he placed these two words beside my name

I not a good person entirely, usually a harsher person, and if I haven been “bad”before, perhaps I wouldn’t understand when it’s right to be “good”.

I like to think its takes a really “good” person to see another person “good”.


2019 was a rough year for me but it was a needed good pile of dust on me.

While I “clean” myself up neatly along the year, I realised how dirty grey I have been blinded all along.

So I made many changes ‘removing’ what I had been tainted upon.

And changed my whole being entirely, ‘little somehow’…


His letter attempted “to bring back my kindness” to the purest state of me.

But the cold fact, I didn’t want to look back at the "old" me anymore.


I will like to taste “some revenge” no matter how “hefty” the price is.

This "new christian" boy actually "shalom" me now? (Hmmm...er?)

Should I disregard his "reminder" or can I try the new year with my "dark dark moonlight cheekiness"...


Something I still can decide within these 9 days.

For I want to "die" with no regrets.

Unless I can "live" with new blissfulness.


Still,

Thank you B, your letter's still "precious" in this moment.

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